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Domestic Violence
If you are in fear for your safety or the safety of your children, you may have to consider leaving for a season. Leaving in a violent situation can be the most dangerous time of all. If you have not properly prepared for that possibility odds are high that it will not go well. It is better to be prepared and not need to leave than to be unprepared
Preparing to Leave
- Open a savings account and/or credit card in your own name.
- Prepare a bug-out bag with key items from checklist below.
- Identify a trusted neighbor and explain your situation and plan.
- Decide who at work you will inform. Include security. Provide a picture of your abuser if possible.
- Devise a code word to use with your children, family, friends and neighbors.
- Identify escape routes and practice using them.
- Get and use a PO Box for personal and official mail
- Put photos and heirlooms in storage or at a friends house
- Clean your browser history, change your passwords, etc. Follow the directions at: http://www.new-hope.org/clear-browser.html
- Place one extra set of keys in a safety box under the bumper and one with a neighbor
- Keep the shelter or hotline phone numbers close at hand.
- If an argument seems unavoidable, position yourself where you can easily get away.
- Stay away from bathroom, kitchen or anywhere else weapons might be available.
REMEMBER: Leaving your abuser is the most dangerous time!
Safety with an Order of Protection (OOP)
- Keep your OOP with you at all times. Give a copy to a trusted friend or neighbor.
- Call the police if your partner breaks the protective order.
- Inform family, friends, neighbors and your physician that you have an OOP in effect.
- Screen your phone calls using caller ID or use an answering machine.
- If you have to communicate with your partner, determine the safest way to do so.
- Attend a women's or victim's support group for at least two weeks.
What to take when you leave:
IDENTIFICATION
- Driver's License
- Birth Certificates
- Social Security Cards
- AFDC/Food Stamp Paperwork
LEGAL PAPERS
- Order of Protection
- Lease, Rental Agreement or Deed
- Car registration and Insurance
- Medical Records
- School Records
- Work Permits/Green Card/Visa
- Passport
- Divorce Paperwork
- Custody Paperwork
FINANCIAL
- Money and/or Credit Cards
- Checkbooks
OTHER
- House and Car Keys
- Medications
- Small Saleable Objects
- Jewelry
- Address Book
- Pictures of You, kids and Abuser
- Children's Small Toys
- Toiletries/Diapers
- Change of Clothes
- Cell phone and charger
- Summerville Victim Advocate - 821-3698
- North Charleston Victim Advocate - 740-2824
- Charleston Victim Assistance - 577-7434
- My Sister’s House - 744-3242
- People Against Rape (PAR) - 745-0144
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